I’ve been back from teaching at Feri Camp for a few days now. It’s taken me awhile to get back into the routine of my daily life, and thankfully Chas has been very supportive in that area. I’ve actually gotten a lot of work done since I returned, but I have also had a lot of my attention on all things Feri, making plans, talking to friends, and contemplating what I think is a very healthy future for the tradition.
Camp this year was an incredible experience. I was impressed by the level of sincere commitment to this path, and by the fierce openheartedness of the participants. A lot of energy was raised, and when that happens our complexes tend to arise into view. The result was a lot of cleansing work, and whole lot of sharing… of joy, of pain, of fear, and of laughter. I felt truly blessed to have the opportunity to be in such an environment where we could come together as friends, as lovers, as family, to face both our beauty and our darkness, seeing both as holy.
I learned a lot during this trip. From the beginning I felt that this was about claiming more fully my own power, and I walk away feeling powerful; alive, charged, and changed. More of who I already am. A tremendous amount of energy was raised during our few days there, through trance… through ritual… through drumming… through dance… A common theme being the quest for the Black Heart that really did shine brightly in the eyes and smiles of those present. We did serious work! But also did we laugh… sometimes to the point of tears; the kind of laughter that hurts your cheeks and your belly and reminds you just how wonderful it is to be alive. That we were able to share that, and so much more with each other, is a blessing into itself.
I led some trance work with the Guardians, which always leaves me buzzing, but it was my session with the Amethyst Pentacle that really surprised me. When Chas and I wrote it back in ’02 we knew that it was powerful, but going into trance with it and running its power with the participants at camp was nothing short of astounding. I was impressed by the willingness of those present to look into the face of their own pain and –still feeling it– claim back their power from its clutches. Certainly this is work that will need to be done repeatedly, but that first step is most often the most frightful and that so many looked into that dark mirror of the self and met its gaze so evenly, is an inspiring sight to behold. All this along with reverence, determination, and laughter made the atmosphere both casual and relaxing, as well as focused and filled with deep purpose. As I said in another forum, if this is the future of Feri, then it is something that we can all be proud of. I know I certainly am.
I am also proud to have worked with so many fabulous teachers. This was my first time working with Karina of the BlackHeart line, and it was a tremendously satisfying experience. She really knows her stuff, and has a great command of the Faery current. I am proud to call her a sister of the Craft. Anaar I worked with last year, but it was this year that showed me another facet of her own commitment to the Gods; her connection to them is deep, real, and above all, personal. You show me a Witch who can yell in anger at the Goddess, and I’ll show you one who walks the walk. And finally Michele. Her attention is like a surgical instrument, cutting right to the heart of the matter. She doesn’t waste time with her words, but lest you might think her harsh because of it let me tell you she is one of the kindest people I know. And one of the funniest. That final night there she and I stayed up all night long just talking about life, about Feri, and just telling each other silly stories. We finally had to leave to try and let Anaar and Karina sleep. We paid for it that final day… in the form of dropped shields and no filters at all… but it was worth it. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.
Now I am home and my life is shifting. People are contacting me and asking if I might travel to their area to teach. It comes at a good time because it is something that I have contemplated for awhile, so I find myself looking into how it might work both in terms of finances, but also in terms of energy; my time here at home is important, as Chas needs to take care of his mom when I am away. But he is also very supportive of me following my bliss, so it looks like I will be traveling at least some in the future. It’s a great feeling: to be exactly where you are supposed to be.
With that in mind I shall end this with a blessing to all of you reading this: May you find yourself exactly where you need to be. And may you have the presence of mind to recognize it.